From MISSY J.
"Hey Tim, it might be fun to see what other icky jobs people have had to endure under that "other duties as assigned" clause that's in so many theatre contracts."
We here at Diva Clones HEAR and OBEY!!!!
Go for it, gang...and all former BOONIES speak up loudly!!!!!
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22 comments:
Wow...where the hell is everybody?
Melting. We're all melting...
Bob
I'm mentally in Sweden.
I wish I had a story to add, but I guess I've been pretty lucky there. Talk backs with audiences, meet and greets and such were a little annoying to have to go through when all you want to do is get out of costume and go to the bar or go home.
I think the worst that I can remember was having to ride on the LSF float during the 1999 season. (it was actually in the contract) I remember it was at least 97 degrees and we had to run around and pass out flyers and wave to the folks. People didn't give a shit who we were. And you could tell. I told them we should have had candy to throw out. That was crappy. Mainly because it was so damn hot.
Summerstock in Pennsylvania, I had to clean the bathrooms. We all had assigned duties around the theatre, but cleaning the bathrooms really stunk.
Also had to do childrens theatre in addition to the shows we were doing at night. My schedule was:
M-F Days=rehearsal
W-Sun Nights=performance
Sat/Sun Days=childrens theatre
Mon night=clean bathrooms
Tue night=childrens theatre rehearsal
Eventually, I threw a hissy fit and was reassigned to "throw a tantrum" duty. Which I was much better at, and performed happily any time they asked me to do something cleaning related after that. I am sure the rest of the cast despised me once I escaped the assigned duties, but I think I earned it after cleaning up their ass signed doodies.
Wow, that was a cheap one...
-JB
Hey X -- belated birthday and anniversary salutations to you!
Well, I can second D$'s post about the joys of trailer living at Boone. But aside from that, I don't recall any Boone work that was too onerous. Somehow I escaped having to dredge the pond and rake the stage. The weirdest thing I had to do -- but also the coolest -- was prepping Shannon for his body burn. I must say that Zel Gel is one of the most bizarre substances on the planet. It has this really strong odor, and it's goopy and slimy. Every night I had to squeeze out a shirt soaked and refrigerated in the stuff. But at least it was cold and refreshing out there in the mugginess! The other thing that sticks with me from Boone was the bats swooping in and around the stage at dusk. But I guess there weren't too many, because thankfully we never had to shovel guano.
Never really had "ick" jobs in the theatre. At my first gig, The Globe of The Great Southwest, it was in the contracts that everybody had to work crew. But we were working in a Shakespearean replica theatre...so aside from a few platforms and odds and ends...there were no sets to speak of. It was mostly striking what little there was between shows. But that stuff never bothered me.
After my sojourn at the Globe, I went to Dallas and immediately became Equity. Working with some of the stars in Dinner Theatre could be pretty "icky" sometimes; but, to put it indelicately, hardly compares to having to scrub stranger poop and pee off toilets.
Never had too many ick jobs in theatre...mostly cuz I just think being in a theatre and around anything theatre related is pretty cool.....BUT I do have a pretty humilating story...which results in serious Icky feelings/damaged pride....
Back in AGL's younger days, it was requested of me to be the LACC "dancing star" (part of their theme that year)...I was told that I would get paid and the star costume would cover my head and all u would see were my black-tights-wearing legs sticking out from under the star costume...I was hesistant to do this...because I felt a little like why do you need ME? I am experienced professional actress..why not a high school kid who needs a little something on the resume?? But being a team player and it would help AGL for some reason if I did it and not minding the fact I would be covered and it paid $50...I agreed. When I arrived at the event, I was told that there would be this presentation, they would swing the doors open, I would sashay throught the crowd to the front of the room, ballon drop, party over. Seemed okay...
I arrived wearing no makeup, hair in a ponytail...seeing I would be covered over my head. To my horror, the nice young lady in charge showed me my star "costume"...TWO PIECES OF CARDBOARD TIED TOGETHER WITH YARN!!!! NOT COVERING MY HEAD OR MUCH ELSE FOR THAT MATTER. I gasped, swallowed, and since I was there representing AGL...ran to the older southern ladies at the Marriot's hair salon...who took pity on my predicament and gave me what I would like to call a free old fashioned KY makeover: a bouffant french twist and some serious eyeshadow....but it was free and they were sweet...but before i could "adjust" and tone it down a little...it was places for the dancing star.
So the doors swung open...bulbs flashed, news crew's cameras turned on me and I did a little dance through the crowd...oh I felt a massive red blush creep across my already rouged cheeks...there were folks from the theatre community, folks from goverment, people I knew...and I was dancing through the tightly packed crowd looking like an extremely poor Vegas burlesque dancer.
All I can say, to me, I'd gladly give back the 50 bucks to get rid of the ick that still on occasion haunts my pride in nightmares....
An actor's ego is so easily bruised.
That's hilarious.
Remember that "How the Grinch Stole Christmas thing in Victorian Square", Lou?
OHHHHHHHH MY GOOOOOOSH! I FORGOT ABOUT THAT..not as humilating in my psyche as the dancing star situation..but still a bit icky...I guess it was made all better because I had u to be with me...
Aaaaaaah ain't it sweet?
For me it's Boone stuff, combined a bit with some "icky" things I've had to deal with in a previous job (not anything here in KY, btw- long before I came here to the lovely Bluegrass state)
I have to piggyback on what D$ said regarding living conditions. I, too, found myself having to clean up after lots of young whipper-snappers in 01 when we moved into the modular homes (i.e."trailers")- but LEMMEE TELL YOU , before that...uggghhhh! FOr the first half of the season we had to stay in other quarters, as the mods weren't completed yet (that story and the labor strife it led to is a story all it's own for another time!) Tim Bell, Scott Mac, and myself were shacked up in a little farmhouse that some of the farm hands stayed in their in Mercer co, and it SEEMED wonderful at first...till THEY came! I was sitting around having a peanut butter sandwich w. Mr Bell, when I saw a shadow dart across the floor, and what do you know...a mouse??? Oh no...much worse- big ole RAT! And he had friends! We had to set traps and I'd hear them snapping away in the middle of the nioght- it was really awful. I finally had to go crash at Tuttles house for a few days till the mods opened...
But as for the work, I never got bathroom duty, nor did I have to dig the pond. Did have to BAIL it a few times, though...that kinda sucked.
I won't go on and on about the job stuff...suffice it to say that I worked for a real "swell guy" who loved to make me do all the dirty work and then liked to complain that I never did anything...oh well, if you know me, chances are you know the story anyhow...
Not the most accurate response for the topic but it is all I can think of right now......
I was introduced as the "sound man" to someone by a boss at a school function. Needless to say, I was taken quite by surpise (but couldn't show it) because I don't know shit about sound equipment, and the school already had
a "sound lady".
She knew everything about sound equipment.
I thought the boss may have had a small stroke or something.
Turns out they were prepping her for getting fired. I was planning on getting her to teach me some stuff over the summer, but they fired her long before summer break and so she did not feel obligated to teach anybody anything at any time.
We got a "new sound lady" who, uh, didn't know anything about sound equipment even after running a show choir for sixteen years.
It was very Twilight Zone-ish.
There has been plenty of ICK jobs on my side of the curtain.....
The hardest... no not hard... difficult job was dismantling the old AGL.
The LOADS of rotting, falling apart old costumes and material were bad. The trip upon trip of random stuff that had been hidden in corners was bad. The boxes and boxes and boxes of old files etc. was a pain.
I am sure BC and Tuttle can attest to these things....
The part that really got to me was the "Production Graffiti". Since time began (or AGL anyway) each production would sign the backstage. AS TD this was something I encouraged. You could stand backstage and SEE the history, the people who had been on that stage before, the shows, the catch phrases, the love.
The destruction of this ... museum of us ... was absolutely the hardest job I had in theatre.
-Russell
I remember looking at all of that production graffiti backstage while waiting to go on. Not only did it give you something to read while you waited, but it also give you a sense of the great shows and excellent actors that had been on the stage before you. I'm sure it was hard to tear it all down.
Ah, memories.
I miss that small, intimate space.
"...right before a performance a mans colostomy bag broke, sh*t all over the bathroom..."
I think we HAVE A WINNER!!!!!
Steve, Be careful about hanging or taking down lights during a thunderstorm. Barry Baughman, who was the TD and professor during my days at UK, went to Dorset, Vermont once summer through the auspices of Professor Charles Dickens who always did summer stock there. He was eletrocuted (and killed)in a lightning storm, striking lights. Talented guy.
So talented, the sparks were flyin'!
That's right, you were the dog! Boy, now it all comes back to me. But you were a fabulous dog, I must admit. All I had to do was hand out flyers and say quietly to myself, "I'm glad I'm not up there."
Yeah..I think I have blocked the Victorian Square thing out...was I high or drunk or something???? Did I recall my dancing star episode from my above post and just self medicate??? My memeory is incredibly fuzzy! Was it Kim, Adam, me and Alicia???
I remember Michael Oaks, Kevin, you, me, and Alicia. I don't remember if Kim was a part of it. Maybe she was.
And I KNOW I was high. That I do remember.
Ohhh yeah. Damn. I fur-got all about that.
I did a three-show day then a two-show day that started at 9am a couple of years ago in Sound of Music. All I can say is "DANG!"
Best regards from NY! » »
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